Neglectful

I know, I've neglected this blog, and really I've neglected myself. Just no drive, no desire, and no umph to get this going. I know, it's just a cop out. I guess I just really need to sit down and find out why I'm sabotaging myself ALL of the time. One excuse over the other. My house is a mess, my kids are whiney, I'm too tired, I'll do it tomorrow. The excuses never end. I deserve a better life, I can achieve my ideals. I'm better than the rut I'm stuck in. Set backs are inevitable, things happen, but the excuses aren't worth my life. They aren't worth my children having a mother who is too tired to play with them outside. They just aren't worth it. I'm worth more then an excuse.


I'M WORTH MORE!!!!

A little behind...

I've not done the best this past week or so. This stressful weekend, I did eat almost everything in site, and made one excuse or another why I wouldn't walk/exercise. I've got to make that commitment to change my life. That I am in control. I need to stop sabotaging myself and get moving. It's not going to fall off by itself, only I can lose this weight.

I'm just so frustrated.

A Good Start

So I've had a pretty good start this past week. I walked with my SIL for 3 days this past week. I hope to continue to walk at least 4-5 days a week. I tried the Yoga DVD as well, and although it was super hard I felt pretty good afterwards. It was a little difficult to do since Melody decided to climb on my legs and back while I was in some of the positions. What a stinker.

I've not been eating terribly, but I figured this month I'd focus on moving more rather then my food. Of course it will be in the back of my mind to pay attention to what I eat so as to not go overboard.

Achievement

The buzz these days is to pick a word to best represent 2009. I finally found mine: Achievement. That's what I need to strive for. To achieve my goals I set whether it be weight loss, spiritual inspiration, mundane duties. I can and will achieve those things I set my mind to. What about you?

I've been doing so good these past couple of days. My eating is ok, but I've walked (walk away the pounds) 2 miles so far since yesterday. I plan on doing the DVD 5-6 days a week. It helps that I'm the motivator for Susan. Some sort of motivation is what I need to get going. I also bought a Biggest Loser Yoga DVD and did some tonight...whoa boy. It was tough but I feel better after doing most of it. Melody was trying to help me ;). This has got to be my year. I can feel myself getting sicker by the day.

I told my mom that this was my time. She's leaving me to serve the Lord with my dad and I promised her I would get healthy. Her weight for me to be at is 170. Actually she said 165, but that's my ideal weight, so anywhere in the area is perfect. I've got a long way to go, but I can do it. I have it in me to not hold back. To better myself and my family. Only I can change myself and set the tone and example for others. I pray for strength to carry that burden and not get discouraged. I will have those awful moments of weakness and want to give up. I pray I will get past the hurting, the sadness, the dispair, whatever lies ahead. I can't hide anymore or ignore the inevitable. I won't give up hope.

Losing Hope

I don't know what my hold up is.  I know I'm not getting enough sleep, but that's no excuse for getting something done.  I'm getting frustrated and not sure where to turn.  I know that I don't need to have access to a pool, but I soo enjoy swimming.  I know that having sidewalks aren't important, but I wish we had some around here.  I'm just at a loss at what to do, and I just have a hard time with eating so much junk.

Still nothing

I'm at a stand still.  No progress being made with my weight loss, but at least I haven't been gaining.  I've been able to weigh myself on my MIL's scale, and it's not as bad as I had originally thought.  Just gotta plug along and find that nitch that will keep me motiviated.  Now that it's getting cooler, I'm thinking of going for a walk with the kids after dinner.  Will be good for them to get out of the house, as well as me.  At least I'm not beating myself up over all of this.

Mistakes

A lady over at Faith Sisters posted the 8 mistakes you can make while trying to lose weight.  I decided to post them here so it's easier for me to find them.  I'm still not doing the best I can...yet, but I'm determined.  

1. Get more sleep. After a very short period of time (about 6 nights), studies show that your glucose levels can rise if you get only 4 to 7 hours of sleep each night. New parents are excluded, but everyone else should try to hit the 8 hour mark as often as you can and get to bed BEFORE midnight. Every hour of rest before 12 a.m. is twice as valuable as the hours after midnight: Our cortisol levels are lowest before midnight therefore our recovery is the highest.

I'm super bad about this one.  It really isn't very often that I'm in bed before 1:30.  Partly because Loney doesn't get home until just before then..but it's no excuse.  I'm sure if I change this even by going to bed before Midnight I'll probably see a change right away.

2. Eating fewer refined and processed foods. Avoid fast and fried food and try to consume as many real foods as you can. It's also imperative to get enough fiber (helps with elimination); fruits and veggies are a great way to fill up.

I don't even know if I want to discuss this one.  Eating more fruits and veggies is a must.  Just really hard sometimes when we're kinda in limbo with our house.  I know..that's no excuse.

3. Avoid sugary drinks and reach for more water. Water is great for so many things like digestion, eliminating toxins in the body, and transporting important nutrients to our cells which need energy to burn calories. Americans drink 20% of their calories, so be careful of that silent pitfall.

I really should drink more water. I really try, but sometimes it's just not enough.  In time it will be though, I won't crave the sugary drinks...even the diet ones.  Super sugary drinks are gross.

4. Get to know your kitchen. I realize it takes more work, but the simple truth is we eat out or order in too often. There is a greater opportunity to control what is in your food if you cook it yourself.

I'm really bad about this, especially around lunchtime.  I'm not sure why I want to eat out so much for lunch, but I do.  Probably because it's easier with the kids.  I need to lead by example.

5. Slow down. When you do sit down to a meal, don't woof it down. Our culture encourages eating while driving or sitting at our desks. The only time we seem to sit down and our food is at Thanksgiving. The monks chew each bite of food 100 times (which is excessive), but they also eat only until they are full. They recognize that chewing their food more makes it easier for the body to digest.

This is a big problem of mine.  I grew up in a big family and probably had it in my head that if I didn't eat fast...there wouldn't be any left.  I know it's bad for me so it's something I need to concentrate on.

6. Breathe. There are so many days that I don't breathe deeply. In the morning, mid-afternoon, and at the end of the day take a 10 conscious, belly-deep breaths. Close your eyes, pull that air deep into your stomach via your nose and let all the junk out through your mouth. Whether its a stressful day, or you just want to start and end your day on the right foot, breathing is important.

I think this is one you take for granted.  I find that when I just relax and take some deep breathes I feel better.  I think this is one I need to take to heart.

7. Don't starve yourself. Oddly enough some of you may not be eating enough, and the lack of calories is putting your body into save mode. Our bodies are so brilliant, and if they aren't getting enough food, your metabolism will tell your body to store each and every calorie it receives or to make energy from whatever muscle tissue you have. Not good. Oh and by the way, don't skip breakfast. People who skip breakfast are over 4 times more likely to be overweight.

How many are guilty of this one?!?  I try not to starve myself, just get so busy with everyone else, I just forget.  I need to eat when I feel hungry and start slow.  I need to learn to read when my body is full...kinda goes along with the eating slower.

8. Do more than exercise. Even if you are working out, you can't eat and drink whatever you want. It really is a three sided puzzle: balancing exercise, food, and (oh yes) the spirit (which stress and happiness play into).

Should be a no brainer right?!?  WRONG!  I've always not likes exercise...could be why I'm having issues huh.  It's no excuse to not move more.  Now that it's getting cooler outside, I just need to take my kids for a walk to start with.  We'll have some quality time together, and it'll be good for all of us.  I need to find what's right for me (besides swimming ::crying over this one::) and stick with it.  

In the next few days, I'll write a list of commitments on here that I'm willing to change/try.  Perhaps having it written down will help me too.